Carmine's: Penne Alla Vodka

To not make the same mistake as last week, I decided to pick the next recipe ahead of time.  It had been a very long day and I wanted one that would be my reward for surviving the week without killing anyone.  It's the little things that count.

My day started when my alarm clock didn't go off.  And by "alarm clock" I mean my 4-year-old, Tyler, who has never slept past 6:30.  Have you ever had that moment when you wake up and you think to yourself, "I feel so rested.  Why do I feel so rested?  I never feel--OH CRAP!"  And then you realize it's because the alarm didn't go off.  That was me and now I had less than an hour to get the kids to school, and me to an appointment, on time.

Some parents, when referring to their children, will compare them to a pack of wild animals.  When I'm on a time crunch, my kids are more like sloths with mono.  Why walk up the stairs when you can sit down and go up them backwards?  Why get dressed quickly when you can do it using one arm while pretending the other one is broken?   Why go right now and tell mom you can't find your shoes when you can wait until it's time to walk out the door?   These are the moments I remind myself in just 4,956 days the last one will leave for college.  I can do anything for 4,956 days, right?

Somehow, we managed to pull it off.  We were going to be on time.  That is...until we walked outside.

Really?  REALLY??  I don't have time to change a flat tire!  After yelling a few choice words (In my head, I can't have Tyler cussing at preschool) I remembered Aaron was out of town and I could just take his car.  I could deal with the flat tire later, kids had school, and I had a doctors appointment in 20 minutes.


No woman enjoys her annual visit to her OB/GYN.  Even the ones who have crushes on their doctors (oh, they're out there) have a hard time enjoying any moment that involves the words "stirrups" or "scoot forward a little," regardless of how cute the doctor is.  Then you get to pretend like it's perfectly normal to chat about your plans for the afternoon or what the weather has been like, while a man you see once a year tells you to raise your arm above your head while he checks for lumps.  Not awkward in the least.

At the end of the appointment he tells me, that at my age, I need to start having mammograms.  He also said I was in luck.  There was a cancelation, and if I could wait 15 minutes, they'd be able to see me next door.  Just great.  Woke up late, flat tire, yearly exam, told I was old, two more flat tires - excuse me - a mammogram, and it's not even 11:00 am.  At this point, all I need is a colonoscopy.

By the end of the day I just wanted to sit down, open my cookbook, and find something that would make this miserable morning a thing of the past.  It's as if Carmine's had read my mind, page 118, Penne Alla Vodka.  It's also been known as Penne Alla Russia.  I think we should call it, Penne Alla Forget About It.  Whenever we have a bad day we want to forget about...page 118, my friends, page 118.


Carmines: Penne Alla Vodka 

First step was to make the marinara sauce.  I've never made a marinara sauce from scratch before, and was genuinely surprised with how easy it was.  Who knew such simple, basic ingredients, was all it took to create something so delicious and versatile in so many recipes.

Once the marinara sauce (pg. 288) was started, I was able to turn my attention back to the vodka sauce.

I have all of my ingredients chopped, sliced, poured, and measured.  I was feeling pretty good about this one.  The recipe says to cook the onions until they begin to soften.  No problem.  Then add the garlic and cook until the onions are golden brown - but to not let the garlic brown.  A little advice...the time from not browned garlic, to burned garlic is surprisingly fast.  Dump it out, wash the pan, cut more onions, chop more garlic, and with lesson learned, we try again.  Much better.

I then add the fresh herbs.  I must say, it's only been twice now that I've used fresh herbs instead of the dried ones in the cupboard, and I love it.  I love the smells, I love the taste, I love how it makes me feel like a super cool mom who cooks with real herbs, and I love the colors it adds.

In addition to the fresh herbs, this particular recipe says to add 1/4 to 1/2 a teaspoon of red pepper flakes.  In the directions, it says to add to taste, which one can correctly assume means somewhere between 1/4 - 1/2 a teaspoon, because that's what's indicated on the list of ingredients.  Not to over use the word love...but I love how even though it says "to taste," it still gave parameters for people like me.  Otherwise, I would have maybe added two little, tiny flakes and Aaron would have added a tablespoon or two.  So far, I'm a big fan of the authors of this cookbook.

Now that this onion, garlic, herb and red pepper mixture is done...it's time to add the vodka and light this baby up!  When I was able to talk with Chef Ford and ask him questions, he actually showed me how they light this recipe on fire.  He added the vodka, dipped the pan slightly into the fire, and whoosh, the pan had flames coming out of it.  That was some mad kitchen skills.  When you start lighting dishes on fire - you're legit.  It looked so easy, I was pretty excited to look all legit with my own mad kitchen skills.  Oh, Brenda.  Will you ever learn?

Here's a twenty second video you can watch, with the assumption, that I too can effortlessly light things on fire with my mad kitchen skills:

Or you can watch the longer, un-edited version, if you want to see the difference between mad kitchen skills and getting mad in the kitchen skills:

Either way - I set food on fire.  On purpose.  That's pretty legit.  I'm thinking my children should start calling me Faux Chef Walker.  Just a thought.  On a side note - thank you, Susan, for filming the awesomeness of the moment and for keeping Aaron out of the kitchen while said awesomeness was taking place.  Aaron, small contained fires, and fire extinguishers are not a good combo.  Another story for another day.

Back to the recipe.  Flames have died out, marinara sauce added and simmered, heavy cream slowly stirred in and brought to a boil.  The recipe says to start the noodles at this point in the process.  Because I didn't read through all of the directions before hand, I had started and finished cooking the noodles well before now.  I'm not sure if after the sauce boils for three minutes, rests off the heat until the noodles are done, and then brought back up to a boil would make a big difference.  I'm not sure if the sauce would have been thicker or if it would be the exact same otherwise.  

Because I already had the noodles cooked, my sauce never cooled down.  After it boiled for three minutes I instantly added the grated cheese, and stirred it for about a minute before dishing it up.  I will definitely, hands down, be making this meal again.  The next time, I will be sure to follow the directions and see if it makes a difference.  I'll let you know.  

This vodka sauce has the most rich and creamy taste, yet it didn't feel heavy.  And the heat from the red pepper flakes made this the best sauce I have ever had.  I was hesitant about adding them because I'm not a big fan of red pepper, but I have to admit, the sauce wouldn't have been as good without it. 

    

Family (and friends) Reviews:

Aaron:  Loved it.  Would have been perfect with more heat, but that's just me, because I like to heat things up...if you know what I mean.  (as he repeatedly moved his eye brows up and down)

Yes, Aaron, we all know what you mean.
                   
Brenda:  Favorite sauce ever.  I'm actually irritated I promised my boss some, because now I won't have leftovers for tomorrow.
                                                       
Noah (future Chopped judge):  I really liked it.  I thought the heat was an excellent choice with the richness of the sauce.  It was a bold move.  Presentation could have been better.

Reagan:  I didn't like the sauce, but I like the grated cheese on my noodles.
(Reagan never eats anything on her noodles, except cheese)

Tyler:  Can I have some cake now?

Susan:  I liked it a lot.  It's probably the best sauce I've ever had.

Seth:  I agree.  One of the best sauces I've ever had.


As I was tucking the kids into bed later that night, they asked me if we could all take turns picking which Carmine's recipe I would make next.  All thoughts of sleep were forgotten the second the word "yes" left my mouth.   A few minutes later I watched as they were flipping through my book, huddled at the kitchen table.